lack of sexual satisfaction is Number 2 cause of Crisis between Husband and wife – Maryam Lemu

By Maryam Lemu

My husband and I counsel couples in crisis a lot. The number 2 area we deal with when counselling, is ‘lack of sexual satisfaction’.

We have heard all sorts of things from both men and women. They complain that intimacy for them can be boring, dull, disgusting, too short, a chore, painful or torture. These harsh words are not meant to feature in language being used to describe intimacy.

Sadly culture, pride, ego, self esteem, sexual dysfunction and other factors play a huge role in this issue not being addressed properly.

Women need to be more open and free. More adventurous, expressive, creative and considerate, when it comes to satisfying their spouse.

Men need to be more considerate, patient and compassionate. If they are suffering from some sort of physical sexual ailment, they need to put pride and ego aside and see a professional.

Foreplay for women is very important. They need to understand that for women, intimacy start with emotions. You cannot fight her, treat her badly, oppress her and expect her to be willing and involved in the bedroom. There has to be balance.

Then boredom is a recipe for disaster in relationships. Both have to be ready to be a bit adventurous and try new methods, positions and places.

Make intimacy something you both look forward to. Make it something both feel equally satisfied with.

May Allah guide us all to do the right thing, even when we don’t feel like it. Amin.